Message from the "Editor"

Welcome to the 2nd Anniversary Edition of the Morning Woody. For the past two years we have brought you the best and worst sides of the Anchor players and now we've run out of money following a year of Kamara betting slips.

Once again, thanks to all those who supported our cause either through submitting material or providing regular substance for material. You know who you are and no, I'm not going to buy you a beer...

 

COMPETITION RESULTS

The Christmas Competition saw the highest response - a grand total of four, or five if you include the random responses from one of our female fans. Questions and answers are below and congratulations to those of you who are now proud owners of Morning Woody T-Shirts.

1. What was song three on the Anchor FC album In The Navy? Move, Move, It's The Anchor Boy Groove

2. Excluding this issue, how many Fan Art images have featured Mr. Sapsford? 10 - Captain Sapsford, Sappy 5, The Sapp, Anchor Transformers, Anchorbirds, Cock, Sappay!, Sappy Days, Sappy Potter and Sappy's Gay Day Out

3. How many issues of DEFENDER were produced? 6

4. What's on the bonnet of the Mauve Avenger's car? 2 Skulls

5. How much was the Anchor Player Signed Framed Photo? £39.99

6. In Rich Sapsford's book I Can Be Your Hero, Baby, which sportsman is referred to? Wayne Gretzky

7. Who won the New Anchor Kit competition? Rob Brady

8. Name the three games reviewed by the Morning Woody. Pre-Evolution Soccer 6, The Secret of Woody Island and Dave Watts' Pub League Football Manager

9. What does P.O.O.P. stand for? Purely Organic Optimising Protein

10. Name the two Cowen Klein frangrances. Frigidity and Man Candy

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Rich Sapsford's new clothing range

"Only the best get Benched"

 

SILVERWARE FOR THE ANCHOR F.C.

Following last year's 8-3 drubbing last year, the Anchor (9th in Division 2) were determined not to go down to Vorranova (5th in the Premier) at Maldon Town in the Something Cup.

With manager Jose Pogrinho unavoidably detained, caretaker Mark Woodyard opted for an unorthodox 3-5-2 formation to maximise the attacking skew within the squad and the form displayed in the final day matches versus Newsaints.

Against the anticipations of the crowd, Anchor F.C. found themselves 3-0 up against their Premiership opposition inthe first half. The flow of play was reversed following Mark Woodyard's reckless challenge in the box. Vorronova's penalty lead to a comeback and at half-time the score was 4-4.

The second half also proved to be a close encounter with Vorronova going ahead, then the reverse. Anchor found themselves 7-6 ahead with 5 minutes to go and a failed offside trap led to the scores being levelled at 7-7.

To settle the "final", it went to straight to penalties. Brady - Goal, Vorranova - Goal, Jamie - Saved, Vorranova - Blasted over, Hanover - Goal, Vorranova - Goal, Woodyard - Goal (sold the goalie with the eyes), Vorranova - Goal, Weston - Goal (just). So, it all came down to the last penalty. The shot was taken down to the keeper's left, Coleman went down and stretched out a majestic left hand to push the ball around the post, to give Anchor their first silverware of their 3-year history. More is expected next season.

FAN ART

Offside Man

 

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